7 Starter Dating Tips

If you’re ready to get back into the dating world… check out some of my helpful tips below! 

  1. Determine if you are ready to seriously  date or are you looking to date for fun: Depending on which you decide would help to decipher which guys you would and would not go on a date with. If you are looking to settle down, than do not go on a date with men who are just looking for fun. This will cause you tons of frustrations in the long run and you will eventually have wasted your time dating Mr. Wrong.  
  2. When you go on your 1st date, do not and I mean do not tell your entire life story: The first date is a time where you are getting to know one another. You are listening to see if what he is saying matches up to someone you could potentially like enough to go on a second date with. Telling your entire story before he had the chance to preview the book, could turn him off. Which could lead him running for the hills. You will feel that you wasted your time because you have shared some intimate things about yourself with this individual and he just stopped calling.
  3. Learn to listen: You can usually tell a lot  about someone by the kind of conversations they have. If this person brings up sex several times and you have only been on 2 dates, chances are he just wants to get you in bed. 
  4. Do not play mind games: As women, we tend to assume our guy counterparts know what we are thinking, when in reality they don’t. If you have no intentions on going home with this person, then just be honest about it. Do not assume they know. Your date could be going very well and they can assume it will lead to the bedroom, when all you are doing is being polite. This can cause major conflict and you do not want the headache. 
  5. Be honest: before you can be honest with anyone else you have to learn to be honest with yourself. You have to know why you are going on dates and what you are hoping to get out of them. When you have been dating someone for x amount of time, at some point you have to state what you want. Whether it is a committed relationship or just a friendship. Either way, you need to be honest about it. This will help generate conversation to see where things are and if you both are on the same page. 
  6. Don’t be afraid to date more than one person: Yes, I said it. Dating more than one person can help you to understand what you are wanting in a romantic partner. If you have not made things official, then there is really no reason in being a loyal dating person. You are free to date other people. 
  7. Do not be afraid to walk out of a date: If your date is going horribly wrong, never be afraid to leave. You can always excuse yourself to the bathroom and head for the exit. Or you can have a close friend call you and tell the person you are on a date with that you have to leave due to an emergency. Please do not feel obligated to stay though a horrible date. You have every right to leave. 

There you have it! Those are what I call my 7 starter dating tips.

If you learn to be yourself and enjoy the dating scene, I am pretty confident you will enjoy dating! 

Let me know what you think! 

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Say Goodbye to Mr. Bad Habit

I know if you are anything like me, you have a pattern.

Most human beings have a dating pattern and I am here to tell you that we need to kick that bad habit to the side!

I was reading this one post, and it talked about how we tend to date the same kind of people and we date how we see ourselves.

At first, I disagreed with what they were saying. However, after looking over my last relationships, I found some truth to what the post was saying.

We tend to develop patterns and habits (good or bad) over time without knowing it.

No worries though, I am going to give you 3 tips on how to kick Mr. Bad Habit to the curve.

1. Start building yourself up.

When you feel crappy about yourself or you feel that you don’t deserve someone great, you tend to settle for a loser. When you love who you are and you know longer need someone else to define who you are, then you start to date people who have more to offer. Tell yourself that you are beautiful…smart….worth it. Repeat after me, “I AM GORGEOUS. I AM DRIVEN. I AM A GO GETTER.  I AM WORTH IT!

2. Focus on yourself.

This is something I had to learn. It took me a while, but I finally grasped the concept. I always had goal that I put together and by the grace of God, I accomplished all of the goals I set for myself thus far. When you start focusing on yourself and you figure out the kind of woman you want to become, you tend to not settle for anything less. You start to notice your Mr. Bad Habits and you start to put a stop to the pattern.

I have been doing a lot of reading lately, probably more than usual. I have been reading all kinds of books, spiritual, business, history, etc. Within all of the texts I have read, I have been praying and soul searching. I decided on the kind of woman that I want to be in the future and the kind of woman I want to be six months from now.

I no longer wanted to be a woman who needed a man to define them. I no longer wanted to be a woman who let the validation of people make or break them. I no longer wanted to date men who had nothing to offer me. I wanted to be a God fearing woman. I wanted to be a woman who did not need no one to define who they are and what they would achieve in their lifetime. I wanted to be a woman who did not need a man to complete them, because they were already complete in God.  I wanted to be a woman who decided what success meant to them and who went after their dreams. I wanted to be a woman who said what she was going to do and did not care what anyone else had to say about it.

When you take time to really focus on yourself and figure out what you want in life, you no longer deal with men or people who cannot add to your life. You become selfish with you and your time. When you reach that level, Mr. bad habit has no room to stay.

3. Remember to take it day by day.

Nothing! I mean nothing happens over night. Bad habits are just that…bad habits. It takes time to undue and to get rid of our bad habits. However, when you have a made up mind to get rid of them, in time your Mr. Bad Habit will be no more. You have to decide on the kind of person you want to be and you have to decide what you will and will no tolerate. Of course no one is perfect. We are imperfectly flawed. However, you do not need someone in your life who is going to take from you. You need a man that will add to your life. You have to believe that one day, you won’t be dating the same way or loving the same way. Just take it day by day. In the words of Jordan Sparks, ” take it one step at a time”.

Say goodby to Mr. Bad Habit and hello to better matches!

Let me know what you think!

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